Hi RI,
No, I'm not the sole breadwinner...he actually makes a lot of money. He and I don't share finances, though. We split the bills and he pays half and I pay half. I do make a nice living and have my own recruiting business on the side. I went back to work for a corporation full-time because I can't stand being home all the time.
Honestly, I go through cycles. I have a busy busy life and at times I can focus on all of that and just ignore him, but when things slow down and I look around, it sucks. Also, I've reconnected with my best friend of 35 years (gulp!)...she just lost her husband at 48 of a heart attack a few months ago. She stresses to me all the time that life is too short and she's VERY angry at my ABF because her husband was sick for a few years before he died...he would have given ANYTHING to do normal things with his kids and with her. Mine is just wasting his life being drunk and not partaking of life at all.
Lots of things have happened the past few weeks to slap me in the face and tell me that I need to change my life. I could die tomorrow and I want to be content in life when I do. I'm not content now.
Sorry for the rant...I'm chatty in the morning.