aimeelouise,
I am so sorry you are going through the heartbreak of an alcoholic parent. I understand your pain as I am an adult child of an alcoholic and experienced an absolutely horrific childhood.
My message to you my dear friend is that you can take steps to protect yourself and your child and learn how to move forward in your life and find peace and serenity. Your entering into your own recovery program will HELP your mother! Believe it or not as you become less frazzled, less anxious, less overwrought and learn how to detach your mother will notice ... even in her alcoholic fog!
You cannot in any way stop her from drinking! You are absolutely not responsible for her drinking or not drinking in the past or the future! You will learn this and believe it if you enter into a lifestyle of recovery from codependency and the emotional fallout of being a child of an active alcoholic.
Think about a day when you get up and instead of panic and anxiety worrying over your mother and her CHOICE to drink you wake up with a smile on your face and the joy you should be experiencing in this special time of carrying your child!
It is not good for you to be in constant fear and trepidation about your Mum. It's not good for the baby.
Would you be willing to read some books? Read some of the stickies and find an alanon meeting if I told you it will help you enormously? Please, please, please learn all you can about alcoholism and codependency... it will be lifechanging and liberating.
Only she can save herself dear. If you let go of the rope she may reach out to her HP... or she may not. But you cannot force sobriety or change another person.
The only person you can change or save is you... and that wonderful baby that is on the way. You can break the cycle of dysfunctional family of origin for that baby...
Please keep coming back and sharing with those of us on the board... We understand. We care and we can promise you hope for a better tomorrow if take the steps for your own path and way out from the family disease of alcoholism.