You know what? As hard and horrible as it may sound, a 'break' may be what you two need. That doesn't mean she may decide to move out, but it may mean a break from the intimacy a couple shares. That way, you can REALLY focus on yourself, your sobriety, and your actions.
That is where I am now - my partner and I are still living in the same house, but we do not sleep with one another and are not as touchy-feely and intimate as we would be if we were a 'couple'. This gives me enough space to truly think about myself and how to make my life better.
One thing that is the hard pill to swallow is this: You are only as good to a partner as you are to yourself. If you love yourself and work on yourself and truly make your life better FOR YOU, then you have a much bigger capacity to give that love and devotion to another person.
Maybe not everyone knows or likes RuPaul, but he says: "If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else? Can I get an AMEN up in here?"