I just want to say Thank You to everyone for such an encouraging and reassuring welcome. The anxiety has dissipated a little, though I am still wretching with nerves every 30mins or so
Nothing a good sleep won't sort out. I intend to be active tomorrow, to try to encourage positive thoughts and well-being. Perhaps then I might be able to eat a little. I am quite safe with the detox in a physical sense, I didn't drink spirits other than a 1/2 bottle of wine in the last couple of days. Though I consumed a vast quantity of beer/ale. I have been a binge drinker all my life, I have managed 2 to 3 weeks sober several times this year to date. Then the insipid thoughts of my AlcoVoice come through and encourage me to find a reason or excuse to drink. It is so deceptive. I also experience a strange kind of mania when I have been sober for weeks at a time, racing thoughts, urges to spend money etc. It's not something diagnosable, I have been down the avenue of seeking reason in psychiatry and got no real definitive answer. It is the craving I guess, the sense of loss of control and reckless abandon. It's addicitive in itself since it promotes adrenaline and everything neural that goes with it. It's frightening and the only way I am going to get to grips with it is to talk, on here if need be. I hope everyone will be around when it gets too much. Thanks again
