Lewis, I think you're cutting her too much slack. She embarrassed you. Most people would have been embarrassed too; she was drunk and acting inappropriately and it sounds to me like you tried to sugar-coat it in the morning.
I'm the substance abuser in my family: what made me face up to what I was doing was my husband's insistence that I was acting out of line. Don't doubt yourself. You know she was embarrassing, your friends/co-workers confirmed it. Don't let her off the hook, don't let her think it's ok, that won't help.
It's very hard for substance abusers to find their way out of denial: I needed a loud, definitive voice. You aren't the bad guy: you're the husband and parent who's showing what healthy looks like.
Best to you,
SD