You remind me of me - be as gentle with yourself as you would be with any other person.
I have found in my recovery that my learning curve has three phases:
1) I just did it again! I didn't want to but I did! Arg!
2) I'm in the middle of doing it again and I don't want to! I think I'll shift gears!
3) I'm about to do it again and don't want to. I think I'll do something different.
We all have our limits. Your insights into yourself are spot on! Congrates on that!
H.U.G.S.!! ("Hope U Get Serenity!")