Wanttobehealthy,
I think you did great! I struggle with this same issue all the time. My XAH can now go to the boys sports events outside of his supervised visits (I think that will change this afternoon at the ex parte hearing) anyway, he uses those few unsupervised minutes to promise the boys the moon. Telling them all about their room at his new house. How he cannot wait to have them staying with him.
This sounds so great on the surface, but he is not even close to being able to see them unsupervised let alone stay over with him. They are so confused by what he is saying to them and what reality is that my older son has started his lip licking stress tic again. He chaps the heck out of his lips. And my younger son is acting out in school. They act so excited to see him but he misses all the supervised visits now. They are confused as heck.
It is an awful spot to be put in as a Mom. Just be honest. I try to take the "If you can't say something nice" approach. You answered how I would have, Honestly but it is not your job to try to cover for him any longer......
Good luck, I know how hard it can be.
4MyBoys