Thanks! I'm trying to keep it together as much as possible around the kids. I work a lot and find myself crying during work hours. (family business) I'm planning on getting the book to work the 12 steps for codependents and see where that leaves me. I also am scared to bring my daughter to counseling again because the counselor was very harsh and judgmental on me not leaving him... which, of course I assured her.. this was his last chance. I'm scared I will give him another chance. I need to focus on myself.. like these 12 steps are saying. I need to tell him to live in sober recovery when he gets out of jail. If he chooses not to do those things, then I know he's not going to stay sober. Everyone at his Dad's house.. all 4 of the kids his parents raised are opiate addicts. It's tolerated and enabled and there's is literally nothing I can do about it. I know the him not on drugs really loves me, but the things he's done when he's sick has probably brought him more shame and pushes him further into his addiction. I've come to say that even though I will always love him and he will always love me that it's not good enough. Sometimes love isn't enough. It's a hard pill to swallow that I couldn't love him better. Which is what I was trying to do. I'm glad I found this support place. Reading others stories helps. Thank you.