I had a fair understanding of what AVRT was about just from visiting the site and taking the free crash course. I just completed reading the Rational Recovery book and now I have a fair understanding of how much insight to addiction is involved with AVRT, and I also understand there is a lot to learn after 'learning' AVRT.
One of the chapters that struck such a big chord, is " I know why you drink". I drank because I loved to be drunk/high, and it was that simple. Reading it and saying to myself 'yep that nails it in a nutshell'. That really is the crux of the matter pure and simple, bang right in the face and truer than true, something I think I knew all along, but I think I figured I was unique , as if no one else just loved the feeling. I now think I see that my Beast was 'born' along time ago and I was going along for the ride(or perhaps willingly decided to play chauffer), but I am back in the driver's seat , the Beast is raising a ruckus in the trunk, but in time I think it will be delegated to a maybe a small rattle in the tailpipe or a squeaky wheel.