Originally Posted by
honeypig 
Wavy, you truly ARE sacred--that must be some kind of freudian slip thing there....
It is nothing short of amazing, what you're doing here, and I look forward to hearing from you on a regular basis about how things are going, what you're learning.
Please don't be a stranger here--and as ever, wishing you strength, clarity and peace!
Hahaha oops yep total Freudian slip there :p Thank you honeypig. I'm not going anywhere, this place is a lifeline
Originally Posted by
atalose Believe me I know exactly how you feel and YES there will be peace once you are away from it.
They do like to argue they do like to attempt to suck us back in so guard you rself emotionally as well. You may have to go no contact, change your phone # and if possible don’t give him your new address. Maybe get a post office box and have your mail forwarded to that “in the mean time”.
I left my ex several times and with each time I learned valuable lesions not only about addiction but about myself as well.
This go around in order for me to totally make a clean break and leave all that chaos behind I needed to obtain a restraining order so that he would not harass me via phone or show up where I am currently living. I didn’t do that last time and the emotional pull from him kept me sucked in even thought I was physically out.
I'm not planning on letting him find out my new address. iw as thinking of changing my address to my Dad's initially, so if any confirmation letters get sent to the house they will have his address on, then changing my address again to where I'll actually be living.
I'm also not at all reluctant to get a restraining order the second he does anything that is grounds for one, which may be pretty sharpish. I've seen how his behaviour can escalate in the past and I'm not going there again, firstly to protect me, but secondly to protect the people I'm moving in with and the people I work with. They don't deserve to be subjected to him any more than I do.
I plan to go NC once all the paperwork for the house is sorted out, there may be a few things I need his consent for in order to get my name taken off them. I just hope that doesn't turn into a battle its self!
Originally Posted by
DreamsofSerenity Wavy,
You have filled my day with hope and inspiration! My blessings to you, your cats, and your new wonderful room.
Hugs!!!
Thank you Dreams
It fills me with warmth that my journey lifts other people.
I went to a different AlAnon meeting than my normal one a few weeks back and shared. There were a mother and daughter there struggling with an alcoholic husband/father. After the meeting the mother came up to me to thank me for how much my share had helped her daughter and I wanted to cry. I go to AlAnon meetings to help myself, but that my hurt and struggles have a positive place for someone else just lifted me up inside. Isn't there some saying about in order to keep your recovery you need to give it away? I understand that now.
I really am so grateful for SR and AlAnon, I would never have imagined either one could have had the amazing impact on my life that hey have done!