Old 07-23-2013, 08:47 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
WhoDey
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 818
Originally Posted by BriteBabyBlue View Post
In the last month I have been so aware of how everything seems to revolve around alcohol. In my neighborhood subdivision its cocktails on the deck, festivals are all about beer tents and wine tasting, restaurants push their drink specials on you, no event with my circle of friends and family is without alcohol, ever. That is really no excuse for me though; I drank at home, alone, every night, as well as with others. It didn’t matter.
I quit for 6 months and can relate to a lot of what you mentioned in your post like being proud of my kids noticing my not drinking and losing a significant amount of weight. The above quote, however, was something I really needed to read.

After 6 months, I began to slowly allow alcohol back into my life ... for what I thought were social reasons. It started with a birthday beer at a friend's party. Then it was a beer at the ball park. Then a glass of wine at dinner. No drinking in solitude ... just social drinking.

Then in rapid fashion (one month), my previous drinking pattern returned. Drinking by myself. Skipping out of work early to have the privacy to indulge. Hiding bottles from my wife. The same old story.

I wouldn't wish a relapse on anyone, but for me I think it was necessary. I can see now that moderation is not an option. I don't want to moderate. What I really want is to sit alone and drink as much as I can.

A new Day 1 begins today.

Thanks for taking the time to share.
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