Hi MrN1OA - welcome
Congratulations on your sober time.
I'm sorry you feel so angry about this though
Here's the thing for me - I was desperate for someone to love...for years...but it only really happened when I stopped looking and got comfortable with who I was.
The very time I decided I didn't need someone after all I found someone.
Maybe you're trying too hard?
if you really feel low about this have to talked to someone about it at all - a Dr or a therapist?
D