tori,
Listen to all these people. They have been there, done that. I just separated from my ah of 17 years. I loved him too, but I should have listened to my inner voice noticing how much he drank and how he acted when drunk. But, I married anyway, and have watched and been in pain as the years rolled by and he got worse. Walking on glass, worrying, verbal abuse, watching him act like an idiot, embarassing my daughter when her friends were over, always looking around the bend and hoping, hoping, hoping that he would stop, listening to the lies, losing respect,and the list goes on....
We've all had past loves and you will get over this one too. Do not panic! There will be another love out there someday. Pick yourself up girl. Have confidence in yourself. You don't need a partner to make you whole, you only need yourself. Concentrate on YOU! Let go and detach from him. Go to Alanon. It's not for the alcoholic, but for people who are involved with an alcoholic. You will see things more clearly.
Listen to that intuition. It usually is always right.
Good luck. Life will continue without him.
Sam