Wow, a really difficult problem. It seems as if your husband has an addiction problem also. They teach in AlAnon that you cannot be responsible for other's behavior or control them. Keeping yourself sober will be the best way to help him, but no one can until he sees that he has a problem and gets to the point where he is ready to get help. Hang in there and do not give in to the temptation to join him, the temptation will be VERY strong, but if you fail, you both will be worse off. Hopefully he will one day recognize his problem and seek help.