someone who starts their day with a drink is not a functioning alcoholic, that's an alcoholic that has to DRINK in order to FUNCTION.
look back over the last four years? has his drinking CHANGED in that time? for better? or for worse? have you ever SEEN him drink responsibly?
he says it's not a problem, but he also says it's your fault. that he can still manage to feed a pet isn't exactly worth throwing a parade over. you say he cooks, cleans, takes care of the pets and goes to work. those should be givens....not highlights. those are minimum skills for your average adult. like bathing regularly. hopefully as you consider a future life mate and co-parent you would expect excellence, honesty, commitment, maturity and strong moral compass as MINIMUM requirements??
what i am saying is, don't settle for less than the full meal deal. don't rationalize, justify or overlook the ginormous elephant in the room. tossing a cloth over it doesn't make it an end table.