Thank you for your insight.
I guess I should read in more, absorbing some truth from SR forums has been helpful before...
I thought I had gotten over my codependecy which was so heavy earlier, but apparently it still is here.
About the pains of living with an active alcoholic, I've experienced quite a range, but somehow I am still dellusional about the whole situation for some strange reason... I hope I can change myself and how I feel, that I can get "sober" emotionally too.
Thank you for your posts, p.