My situation is simular. Although he is not my "ex" yet, he is awaiting to go to jail for his 3rd DUI. He is living in the home. He doesn't have a "girlfriend" but is trying to start relationships with some pretty low life scummy women. He says it is just for sex and I shouldn't be concerned. The hard part for me is that I know if he doesn't live with me he will probably be homeless. It is really hard to turn someone you have been with for 23 years to the street. I wish he had some other place to stay. He has no job, money or license and is still drinking. His family and friends will have nothing to do with him. My plan is just to wait until he goes to jail. He say he is going to get 2 years. I hoping that will be enough time to get my life together. I am ashamed to say I have also hit my AH and thrown logs of firewood at him. I was never in trouble legally but it was a wake up call for me to get out of this situation. At the time I did feel he deserved it, but I know it is not right. Good luck to you, it is a really hard situation hoplefully the legal system will free us and keep them. My thoughts are with you..