Hi all. It's been a about a month or so since I last posted here. I started with a generic "is my GF an A? and moved on to this thread:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...bad-worse.html
After reading and listening to everyone's advice, I knew I needed to work on myself and try to move forward. Over the past month, things between me and my AGF went up and down. She continued to drink and deny any problem, only to seem like she was backing off the booze, only to drink even heavier, etc.
This finally escalated into an awful night, which was 2 days ago. When she drinks, she gets pretty mean, talks down to me, etc. I finally lost it and sort of blew up. I screamed and cursed, and generally completely lost my cool. She was very drunk at that point and got depressed, and well, it just wasn't a good night.
The next day, I asked if she wanted to talk about it. She couldn't remember most of what happened, so I recounted it for her.
Now, I had been working toward breaking up with her because she has never admitted there's a problem, and showed no signs of wanting to get help. But rather than turn the talk into a breakup (which is what I had been thinking of doing) I made it more of an intervention style talk. I told her how she treated me when drunk, how it made me feel, and so on.
Then three words came out of her mouth that I never thought I'd hear: I'm an alcoholic.
Anyone in my position probably realizes how strange this moment can be. I always thought it'd be the worst thing I could hear, but having her FINALLY admit it...it made me so happy.
Strange...I know.
Anyway, she finally admitted it, and she said, "I need to get help." Another phrase I thought I'd never hear.
We talked at length about the road ahead, and how hard it would be. I admitted how close I'd come to breaking up with her. She told me that hearing how bad she's treated me is what finally broke through. (Though, i made it clear to her that she has to be doing this for her, and not just for me. She ensured me that was the case. I told her if it wasn't, it'd just turn into resentment, and she said she really, truly wants to get better, for her as well as me).
We had a doctor's apointment this morning to get her some pills to help with the withdrawal. There was a pretty significant set back when she drank before AND after the doctor's visit.
But then she took her handle of rum and poured it out.
When she gets home from work, she starts on the medication.
Okay. I'm sorry that was so long, but I had to get it all out. I do need advice now though, because I know this is going to be very hard and probably full of setbacks and relapses. I'm only cautiously optimistic, because she showed today that she couldn't even go the day of trying to quit without drinking. But now that she poured out the rest, and we have the meds, I'm hoping she will stay strong.
I've never been down this road before. What can I expect? How can I help her through this? We are going to get her in a group ASAP, but is there anything else I should be doing now, to make sure she keeps moving forward?
Thanks for your help.