Thread: Remind me...
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Old 06-19-2013, 02:10 AM
  # 35 (permalink)  
Lulu39
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 490
Originally Posted by wanttobehealthy View Post
And my friendship/family circle has become virtually empty for much of the past year because apparently I did SUCH a good job of convincing others he was great that no one can believe what I've said or why I don't want him back and he in the meantime is spreading every nasty word he can about how crazy and mean and terrible I am and literally friends and family have turned their backs...

I predict he will go on a smear campaign with my kids next and try and get them to hate me too.

Sometimes I think that it would be better to just be in denial again.
I am in the same position. I sometimes think it would be less lonely if I just let him come home. Maybe my "friends" would like me again? However, if I did that he'd wait until the front door was closed and all the "friends" had gone home and then he'd start abusing me, again.

Even my best girlfriends have turned their backs on me, they say they don't want to be "caught in the middle" of anything...yet they pay for him to go on holiday, to stay with them etc and ignore me 100%. One had the gall to send, via him, via the kids a Xmas gift to me! I packed that sh*t up quick smart and sent it back. Nothankyouverymuch!

I can't believe my friends refuse to believe he abused me! It's very painful. DV counsellors say to confide in your friends, perhaps I left it too late and did too good a job of faking that everything was OK?

One of my closest friends, years ago, came to my door and heard him abusing me and threatening me and told some other people. I confided in her properly, well I tried to, after I kicked him out and she claims it never happened! Oh well, nothing I can do about that or the fact they have all dumped me. More will be revealed...

My kids are teens and they are learning what their father is like by his actions - nothing for birthdays or Xmas from their father or their father's family, no contact from their father's family, heck, even their father doesn't call them any more.

I try very hard not to bad mouth my kids' father. If they ask "why" he behaves a certain way all I say is: "He's an alcoholic and a drug addict, it's just what they do."

If I'm out and about with my kids and I see a drunk person or someone off their face on drugs I'll quietly point the person out to my kids and ask them why they think the person is doing XYZ. They always know the answer, ALWAYS.

Anyway, I know what it feels like.
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