I think part of recovery is the gift of knowing yourself to the point where you don't need to second guess and obsessively analyze yourself, situations and other peoples motives. INMO that in and of itself is a codependent trait- obsessively analyzing.
I mean, the more you know and trust yourself, the drive to second guess yourself will diminish. After all, the only thing we have control over is our own actions and boundaries. You already know how to be honest with yourself and your friend.
What a great experience to be able to hang out with someone who isn't a screaming abusive alcoholic Yay! It's necessary to know folks who are more stable than what we're accustom to, so we have reference for more normal situations. it's taken more than once to witness loving couples, good parents and attentive friends before I can start believing I deserve stability and joy. But I do. So do you.
Keep learning that sh*t, I say. Keep looking for happy, stable folks. Keep hanging out with them.
You'll know if you need to change your boundaries. When I keep focused on myself, my children and healing what I have control over, the obsessive traits just falls away. Loving me and creating a safe, wonderful life is my favorite thing to obsess about now, although I still do pick up the comfortable, obsessive game still, I now have memory of and reference for a peaceful, happy life.