Brought a friend to AA today. Making small steps toward being social sober. One of the girls from AA called me and we chatted on the phone for a while. I feel so awkward chatting without a drinking. Even though I would like to make friends and go out and do things, it is just such a struggle for me to not be shy and weird and self conscious. I don't know if it looks like that outwardly, but inside I feel like I'm working overtime with anxiety. Alcohol made that disappear, made it all feel more natural and easy. I got my 2 month chip tonight. Going to see my son tomorrow. Another rather awkward social situation for me since we don't know each other that well and aren't really allowed to DO anything but sit there, but I am trying and he is trying. I just wish every social encounter didn't feel like such an awkward struggle that I want to run and hide from. Baby steps.