Originally Posted by
lizatola 
but he always has these cutting remarks that make me realize that I will never measure up to his 'way' of doing things. Not that I care anymore, but I'm just tired of hearing about how much better his way is, LOL.
Liza dear -
This is very common for A's. They'll never admit it, but their self esteem is lower than low. In order for them to feel better about themselves, they cut us down. They seem compelled to feel superior, no matter the cost, and they don't even see the cost to us. Or if they do, they cover it up with more superiority. They are in self preservation mode in their world of self destruction. How crazy is that?
This is why it's so important for you to take care of YOU. For you to know that you are wonderful, and that the
A is sick. For you to detach your own, true self from what the A says you are. It's not easy when you're constantly being barraged by verbal abuse. And I do believe this is verbal abuse. It takes constant vigilance to care for yourself in the midst of always being told you're inferior by someone you once trusted as your lifelong love. It can be done, and it's so worth it.
For me, counseling helps. Wow did I go from low self esteem to understanding and feeling self worth. Oh there's still so much more to go, but it's made a tremendous difference. An exercise of incredible value.
It sounds as though you're on that path, too. Go Liza!
