And although it sounds like a positive at first, because we're talking about 'good' qualities, it's still actually negative, because it's me giving him credit for being a better person than he actually is, which is detrimental to ME and the way I think about him. Not sure if I'm making sense, but just thought I'd share a different spin on it.
this happened to me in my last "relationhsip" which gives a name to some kinda connection we had. I was telling him how nice, understanding, caring and just all around good guy he was ( what I thought was a normie, because i am an alkie
).
He did get uncomfortable, and kind of squirmed under the unintended pressure I was giving him to be a good guy.
Not a perfect guy. But a good guy.
At least I am projecting positive things now.
And now, I am aware of how I can convince myself of certain things.
Rose colored glasses, still tinged with pink but clearer than ever before.
Beth