Welcome to the SR family!
I found myself in a cycle of madness when I tried to anticipate and control outcomes of my alcoholic husband. I would plan events on his day off to prevent him from being drunk before 3 p.m. He may have been sober a few times as a result, but by 6 p.m. he had made up for *lost* time.
I learned on this website about the 3 C's of my husbands alcoholism:
I can not Control it
I did not Cause it
I can not Cure it
The addiction belongs to the adult with the problem. I needed to give him the dignity of making his own choices. I also had to step out of my role as rescuer and allow him to feel the full consequences of his choices.
Reading on this forum help me find a healthier way to face alcoholism with a loved one. I found a helpful post in the permanent posts at the top of this main forum page. Here is a link to the post that helped me:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...l-problem.html