I wanted to make a brief comment on your post, Fedup. What you say really makes a lot of sense. Your mind, logically, is telling you how awful it has been for so long. But the feelings, the familiarity of it all, is what's missed, the good with the bad. My mind also tells me that she is manipulating me, if for no other reason, simply for the security of knowing she can come back at any time. I have got to cut that. I think that's why I grieve so much, because I know I have to make that decision