I keep mulling over the thought of basing everything on the evidence. Whenever I find myself centering my thoughts on her, focusing on 'the evidence' really helps to readjust my thinking, and to see it for what it is.
The other thing that really helps, is lack of contact. So far, every time I had a conversation, it always ends with me in turmoil again, it undoes the progress I've made. And I know, I'm being manipulated.
Its still early in the game, or at least this stage of the game, and I've got some distance to go. I keep coming back here and re-reading the comments, they re-affirm what I know to be true, and help keep me focused.