This is a tail-ender post... but my own ESH, for what its worth...
I came into this world as a package- arms, legs, nose eyes etc etc... and i came with a history... I entered a family, and a community, for better or for worse...
...there were tough lessons ahead for me- but I decided I wanted to tackle them- enough is enough!
At this end of the journey I have taken this word down again- "enough". I think it is an antidote to my deep need for perfection. When and how do I have enough?
My So [wife] fought and bickered constantly. Both from dysfunctional families. The kids were grossly affected- but it was not as bad as my own family experience.
Everyone wants their emotional needs met- and their physical needs. Money, possessions... maybe tokens of love, or maybe tokens of power or prestige?
I have learned to meet my need for identity and belonging. As I woke this morning and pulled on clothes I examined my heart... there is still a bit of brown-ness, dullness there- but it doesn't overwhelm me...
...this ache could make me feel lonely- and feed my deep expectation of abandonment; then it could turn and make me feel angry at my world.
It could make me want to hurt myself, at least to deeply doubt myself...
...but instead I am sitting on my laptop, I am inspired with the postings above. I am actually doing this as I eat my toast [with jam!]...
juggling things around so the keys don't get sticky...
...I love the company here- I relish the sharing.
David.