Hi Nanoo,
Thank you for your post and congratulations on almost reaching 3 months! I do *hope* to be in your situation at some point, so I'm not completely sure what I would say, but I do believe the fact that you are reaching out for help to understand your situation is a very good sign that you are working at your recovery.
From what I have read here at SR and learned at Al-Anon, each partner needs to work their recovery and be making some progress before they can start to heal their relationship. I second the recommendation for couples counseling and believe having an unbiased third party can be a great help to having productive conversations. I also second the recommendation for showing empathy for what your partner went through as well as validating their feelings - let them know they have been heard and have the right to those feelings.
Good luck!