I agree wishing you were dead crossed the line.
I am in recovery from alcohol too.
I wished my ex dead, but never told him that, it was part of my recovery process.
To each their own.
Both need a program, their own program and NOT take each others inventory.
3 months is a miracle for an alcoholic, but looks like a very short time to those on the outside, do you now what I mean?
work your program, and if he says hurtful things ask for forgiveness.
He can forgive and move on, or continue to punish you.
Only you can decide what or which one to deal with.
Punishment phase is over when healing begins in my opinion.
Beth