I'm really sorry that you are feeling so stressed and so alone. But, you have many people here telling you that you are not alone and that we do care. Allow those good feelings into your mind.
Of course, you want to work on your marriage. I had to do that too. But, above all, you must care for yourself. That's one thing I learned on the way to my bottom. Caring more for others than yourself leads you to the bottom. You must care about yourself, especially now in early recovery.
