Originally Posted by
LexieCat 
Well, Blue, I've always tended to be on the sloppy/messy side, but it definitely got worse when I was drinking, and I never quite recovered that piece of my life when I got sober.
I hope your new place allows you to have the peaceful, orderly surroundings you long for!
And let me be clear, I would win no awards for housekeeping. Ever. My bathroom and kitchen are clean, dusting is just a suggestion and I hate vacuum cleaners so very much...
But up until this house, and until (as I now know) his drinking got a lot worse, everything was okay, not great, but okay. I truly think part of it is just the hamster wheel of his brain, not knowing where to get off, and one aspect that may help is me moving and getting my stuff out so that he can concentrate on sort of one thing at a time without the overwhelming "stuff". Part of it I don't know. I would pack bags for goodwill and give them to him, he would put them in the car - and four years later I go into the basement and there is a pile of them against the wall... I don't know what that's about, honestly. I just don't. But I like the idea if working on a house as prt of the healing... It's one positive way to look at it, to try to make some order out of chaos, this is one thing I can try to do.