Gwenny,
I think everyone here understands. For decades I accepted that the price for my nightly oblivion was a dailey hangover. I sacrificed many beautiful days. It wasn't till I lost an important relationship that I realised the true cost. I didn't want any more loss or to continue to feel bad about myself. I guess it was pride that got me to stop. I hope that you can find a way too. 17 months since my last drink and i feel like a winner and that feels great.