Tsukiko, I think your second conclusion maybe more accurate. I pretty sure my food restriction are bordering on disorderly I did this when I was drinking as well. As a overweight adolescent all I ever wanted was to be thin and now that I am thin is not enough! Wow just realized I'm more f-Ed up then just booze! I think it's time to get a physical and talk to doc about everything put shame aside!
Gracie I had and have those exact feelings you describe to this day I CAN'T ask for help for I always feel like I'm bothering someone or I really don't matter they aren't going to care anyway!
Knowledge is power right do I'm going to work on my issues now that my head isn't filled with cheap Pinot gregio! Thank you for your insite and help! It feels good to ask for help and to be heard