The only way you can stay sober is to forgive yourself. The only way you can forgive yourself is to stay sober. I'm not there myself as far as forgiving myself but I have come to the conclusion that my disease was the cause for most of the bad things I did and my behavior was not intentional, but I am still responsible for it. I was in a meeting last night and what I took away is not to forget the past but don't live in it either, and you have to forgive yourself in order to do that.