Hey TM. Glad you came here to talk about it. Most of us have been there.
I used alcohol to cope with life for many years. Or I thought it was helping me - actually, it was keeping me down and preventing me from growing. Being numb and foggy is no way to go through life, and you already know that. Good things will come out of this. You have many great things to look forward to - and you'll be sober to enjoy them. You can do this!