Originally Posted by
Grok 
I've been a hard drinker for 30 years, all I need to do is stop, just stop, so what makes me keep doing this stupid thing, I want to or I would not be here, but I seem unable, crazy, bloody crazy.
It's called alcoholism. We've all felt like that, I know I have, many times! The best thing to do is focus on not drinking today and seek out support to help you deal with the anxiety and cravings (post here, go to an AA meeting, talk to someone, etc.) Before you know it you have a few days sober and some of the craziness starts to go away. But in order to quit drinking, you gotta quit drinking. Hang in there