Welcome GreenEggsnHam -
I think all of us can relate to your story (I know I can). I found this forum before I stopped drinking and used to come here and think about getting sober (as I was pouring another glass of wine). It took me a while to get up the nerve to post - the idea of actually getting sober (taking action instead of just mulling it around in my head) was so scary.
I didn't really want to give up my reward/escape at the end of the day, but I could tell it was starting to affect me. I'd reached the point where it was getting harder and harder to get out of bed. Alcohol was also slowly replacing other activities that used to interest me. I was "functioning" (so no one really knew I was an alcoholic), but the internal battle was crazy.
This forum was my saving grace. I don't think I even realized how much it was really affecting my life until I got sober.
Glad you're here!
