Liveordie,
It is my husband who has no faith in me and doesnt want our marriage. I dont blame my unhappiness soley on him as I've realized I'm the only one that can create happiness in myself. I used to blame him. I want my marriage to work more than anything. I understand his unwillingness to work on things with me but still resent him for watching me turn into who I became, helping me turn into who I became (drinking with me, offering me drinks knowing I was trying to stop, bringing home alcohol after I asked if he could refrain from a while)....then walking away from me when I really needed him the most.
He doesnt like who I am when I am drinking. I understand that as I dont like who I am when I am either.
I appreciate your input. =)