Sean27

Hi guys and girls

My name is Sean and I'm 27 years old, from england.

I've been battling alcohol since I was 17.

Here's my honest truth - I absolutely love alcohol, I feel like it completes me from the inside, it's the only way I can find any kind of inner peace. I used to swear it was like a medication to stop my head feeling like it was going to explode with voices. (By voices I mean anxiety, worries etc)

I have been to alcohol clinics/counsellors in the past and I did really well for 2 years but I've slipped again, and going back is proving difficult.

I can't actually imagine giving up something I love so much. It's the place I want to be but I know that ultimately I am killing myself, and hurting other people around me.

I don't like the control it has over me, it makes me feel weak, guilty & ashamed but also, there is a part of me that is very happy to let this be my way of life. It feels like it completes me

That is horrible to read back... quite shocking actually. But there's no point me coming on here for support/help/guidance if I'm not going to be honest.

Thanks