Changing is difficult. I work till seven then I have toddlers. My husband is overseas now, our marriage wasn't working out anyway. I have a job, I used to love and now I'm not content. I think the alcohol/drugs showed me a "stress-free" life of sitting at home, out of it doing nothing. It wasn't stress free and just created more stress. I will also try rational recovery and start a blog. I need to get some of these thoughts out of my head.