Agarne-
YES I know you can do it! When I was strung out on meth, I had my house foreclosed on, lost everything I owned, lost friends, family, job, and looked like a walking zombie. I resorted to selling drugs and working at a strip club to make money. I am now a successful professional in the corporate world, a mother to two wonderful kids, and in a healthy relationship. Granted, I am now facing alcohol demons- but I am nipping this in the bud before it grabs a hold of me like meth did. I know it seems like if you can just keep using one more day it might be easier to start recovery tomorrow. But today is the day. You will feel so good on the other side!