I'm sober almost three years, and one of the things I really didn't like about AA is how it took over people's lives, like a cult. I couldn't see how missing dinner with your spouse and children 5 days a week for 5 years was healthy for anyone. There are alternatives. To be "given" 30 minutes a week for together time is sad.
I used womenforsobriety.org online, which is wonderful. There are lots of,other programs, but if your husband believes,the AA lines about how you will drink without it, he may make it the focus of his new life. I don't really know what you can do, but I do think it is very common. I hope you can work it out.
Best,
Nancy