Originally Posted by
pattyj 
My boyfriend thinks he can still drink in front of me because he shouldn't be punished for my problem. What are your thoughts on that? He is drinking beer, which was never my thing, but it's still alcohol.
I just had my first one on one therapy session yesterday and the therapist asked me about my relationship. I feel that after getting sober, all these feelings are coming out. I drank to not feel anything and now I feel everything. Do any relationships last after recovery/rehab? I'm starting outpatient and it's going to be intense. Drinking made me laid back and not really care about anything. Now I have an opinion, my opinion, and I don't like how a lot of things are going in my relationship. Any thoughts?
It's not uncommon for relationships to change once we sober up and start working on ourselves.
This is just my opinion and how I would feel if it was me. I agree that our drinking is our problem. However, I didn't get this way overnight and I am not going to be better overnight. If my partners drinking in front of me bothered me then I don't think it is too much to ask for him not to. People in relationships are suppose to support and help each other. If my partner couldn't help me in this I don't think I could stay with them.
One woman in one of my meetings when she hit rock bottom and ended up in the hospital after a suicide attempt her husband didn't even hesitate to stop drinking to support her. It was a given.
One woman's husband deliberately drinks in front of her or comes home drunk KNOWING how much it bothers her. And he is the one giving her ultimatums to stop. Sorry, but that isn't being supportive.
I'm not in a relationship right now, but you can bet things will be different when I am. If I'm not getting what I need out of it, I won't stay in it. It doesn't mean I have to have everything my own way, but I expect to be treated with respect and to have support. Because that is what partners are suppose to do for each other.
At the end my sobriety is more important than anything or anyone else.