I can relate to that. I have made many resolutions, decisions, and plans to stop using myself. I am more of a marijuana guy, but alcohol and vicodin were my crutches as well. I've found for myself that I do not have the required power to stop using. The drugs and alcohol had me, and there was nothing that I could do to stay stopped once I quit. My defense had to come from something greater then myself. That's why I go to meetings and take the suggestions that people who came before me give me. It really works! I can't explain why it works, but I know that it does.
One thing above everything else I know is that I have to get into action. I have to do something, everyday, or I will end up drunk and loaded. I have seen postings on this site of people who have stayed stopped just by coming here on a daily basis, posting and reading. I don't know what it will take for you, but I will say that for me it took the 12 steps and the entire program that goes with them.