Welcome to SR Secretsover, you have made a wise choice by ( 1 ) admitting you have a problem ( 2 ) reaching out for support. No one needs to do this alone. I personally have an addiction to cocaine. 25+ years. SR is helping me, and can help you. Addiction is a disease and treatable. Plenty of people here in similar situations. Listen to what they have to say. It can't hurt. It can help. God Bless