So much pain
I think I need rehab. One part of me says I'd the easy way out, and so does the other part.... I want to bail. But I also don't think I 'm going to beat this on my own. Not just the alcohol... The screwed up thinking, the self-mutilation, the resentment. I want someone to lock me down, tie me up, an save me from myself. A month of reprieve sounds like heaven. In the meantime, I'm terrified, extremely lonely, nd so,so, sad. I have a five year ld and ag four yer old. They should give me insurmoutable happiness, and all I fl is insurmoutable exhaustion.
I don't think I can o this until I gEt away from everythimg ele. I feel like I'm going to die.