Florence

A lot going on.

I'm filing for divorce today. It's been a long time coming. I met with the lawyer last fall to see what my options were and didn't feel like I was ready yet. But when STBXAH (!) went back to rehab this time -- and promptly cut me off his contacts list at rehab because I told him turning in his phone was the right thing to do -- I decided I wanted off the merry go round. At this point it's just stupid. I don't see deep and meaningful change in his future. I have moved on emotionally, but I still care about him and remember the sweet, generous, tender-hearted guy I fell in love with. But then I rewind and replay the whole tape and I'm like, nope. Couldn't pay me to do that again.

I think I'm ready? We'll see. I have done a lot of work on myself this year to not only get over my toxic relationships and childhood, yadda yadda, but also to open myself up to new people, ideas, and experiences. We basically have no assets to split. Our divorce is going to be all about division of petty stuff and the very serious subject of child custody and visitation for our toddler.

So, right after my appointment with my lawyer, I have another appointment with the Chamber of Commerce to help develop a business plan out of a project I've been working on this year. I can't reveal what it is, but it's exciting, the city government and local arts community has taken a great interest in it, and this is the fruition of a lot of hard work. If you had handed me this opportunity five years ago, I would have shrunk away from it or given it to someone else, it would have scared me so bad.

Wish me luck on both fronts. Thank you SR family for being here.