Debysu, my AS has also treated me worse than anyone else. I asked myself so many times why he would treat his father with respect who has abused him emotionally for so many years and treat me like dirt when I was the one who was always there for him.
The answer that came to me was this: He treated me with such anger because deep down he knew I was not doing what was best for him by supporting his addiction. He also knew that no human being should put up with the treatment I received from him and that was why there was no respect.
If we want their respect, they need to see that we mean what we say and that we are not their doormats. They need to see that we respect ourselves enough not to put up with their abuse.
I went to prison twice a month with a friend to teach a course. It was one of the best things I did for myself. Not only did I get to meet some of the most wonderful people, but it showed me how much time they have to work on themselves.
Prison may be the gift you give to your son, when you have nothing else left to give.