Originally Posted by
lizatola 
I guess I had the whole Al Anon saying in my head: You can say what you feel, just mean what you say, and don't say it mean. I am so tired of ignoring his comments(especially when they're in front of our son) and just blowing it off and letting him think it's acceptable. I guess I felt that at least I got some of it out there and I am hoping the resentments won't build inside of me.
First, it doesn't matter what HE thinks. If it's unacceptable to you, it's unacceptable. As far as your own resentments go, they will keep building whether you state your truth or not--as long as you are expecting something from him. See, the resentments don't come from your emotions (buried or not), they come from your expectations. Saying what you feel is one thing, expecting him to do things differently is quite another.
Originally Posted by
lizatola I totally get what you guys are saying but I have to find some sort of approach where I can address the hurt quickly, express my feelings like an adult, and move on. I buried my feelings for so long and stopped feeling them that I'd like to figure out how to deal with them right now and deal with them like an adult Why is that so wrong?
Nothing wrong with feeling what you feel and dealing with it. Trying to get him on board is the part that will exhaust you and make you crazy. At least that was my experience.
L