Pg. 324
Rational Recovery:The New Cure For Substance Addiction:
Addiction exists only in a state of ambivalence, in which one strongly wants to continue drinking alcohol or using other drugs, but also wants to quit or at least reduce the painful consequences.
It's that experience of "being of two minds" and it can be maddening. Anyone who has ever been addicted is familiar with that ambivalence, to some degree.